We were so blessed to have Deanna Campbell come and share some of her wonderful insight into God’s plan for us as parents at the November MIC meeting!
I know you might have your own notes (or if you weren’t able to attend, you don’t have any at all!). But I thought I would share mine because I have been looking at them everyday trying to grab just a little bit more knowledge and inspiration for parenting my sweet (or not-so-much some days) kiddos.
So here goes!
- FIND JOY IN YOUR CHILDREN!
- Maximize Conversation – Minimize Correction – Kids will talk openly as long as someone is listening & they aren’t being criticized.
- When the heart hears criticism – its loses its will to try
- AFFIRM THE DESIRED BEHAVIOR! Use the word obedient a lot. Try to eliminate the words “don’t” and “no”. Tell the child what you want him to do – not what you don’t want him to do.
- Say YES when you can! I love this one. I mostly love how it throws my kids for a loop!
- Use the word BECAUSE in place of the word IF - No bribing. This kind of messed with my #1 parenting skill. But I am working through it and trying really hard to put this practice in place.
- Positive guidance is more effective than negative response
- CHOICES: Offer choices when there is a power struggle with your children. Give a directive then 2-3 choices. The choices need to be positive and all OK with you.
- PUNISHMENT is for an act of disobedience…Discipline is teaching and training your kids. * Spanking is an easy out *Use natural consequences that fit the crime * Get creative!
- Don’t ask questions that teach your children to LIE. If we know what they have done – don’t ask them about it – tell them what you know and move forward to consequences.
- We create whiners. This hit home because I have one. And I realize that I made him what he is.
I would love to hear any other notes that you have or tidbits of information that I might have missed! Thanks again to Deanna Campbell for your time and God-given insight!
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
So I’ve waited a while to post just to verify that everything was going to work out with my situation. I asked Deanna about my 6 yr old son and his “incident” at school. He had stolen 2 pencils, and came up with a very interesting story about how he won them. Flat out lie. Somehow Deanna knew that I had told him he would end up in jail and that I over-reacted. She advised me to allow the consequenses to play out @ school and ignore it. Interestingly enough I have taken her advise and there have been no men or women in blue at my door. Yet.